*think of a title for this and you get a hug*

In the last 2 weeks (which I would like to point out has been one of the longest 2 weeks ever) I have cried 6 times because I miss people, and nearly cried 7 times, 2 of those times on the luas.

This is not good. I'm sad pretty much all the time, and have found myself losing my love of youtube somewhat, and reverting to the stress-free, work-free, lack of friends online-free world of the sims, where I can immerse myself into the worlds of the families I haven't seen in a year, and have lots of exciting plans for. And by exciting I mean, babies, death, divorce, emos, more babies, holidays, and inevitably more death.

I haven't played the sims in so long for 2 main reasons. I can't pretend to be doing homework with the sims on the screen, and then when I could have been playing it, I chose the internet, because why play the sims when you could be on youtube? Well sometimes I don't want to be on youtube. And it's a bit of an alien concept, considering the last 5 months or so. This is clearly the obsession easing.

I wouldn't mind so much if it didn't happen to be easing at the same time as my social life (not that it had been up to much, what with exams and whatnot) but it is and it sucks.

And what's more, with a huge proportion of our friends gone, the people left are getting very concentrated doses of each other. And we're driving each other insane. Literally. We're the same people at work, we're the same people meeting for lunch, we're the same people we go out with in the evening, we're the same people online at night. So it's understandable that we're finding each other irritating. I know people are definitely finding me irritating, how could you not? But it's the lack of dilution to the group that's the most frustrating. Normally, if one found someone irritating, as is perfectly natural, one can cool off, and hang out with some other people til they relax and can get back to being friends without having a huge fight and ruining everything. But our problem is there are no other people!!

And I miss you!!!!!!!! This isn't funny! I have nothing better to do but dwell on my missing you, and play the sims, and make a vlog, and dwell some more, cos now I'm finished supervising (thank god).

And April threw a handful of sugar at me this evening and it's still all in my hair, and my scalp is all grainy, like when I come back from Papagayo on a windy day and my head is full of sand. Except it's full of sugar.

Just spent the last 3 minutes with the heels of my hands pressed into my admittedly rather crispy eyes. Too much time looking at the screen. Should probably go back to bed. I've been doing this. Going to bed, not sleeping, getting up again and going on my laptop.

Also now like half my music is a no-go area without making me sad, because while I'm pretty sure every person I know has at least one song on my ipod that reminds me of them, few people have 150
=P

Yeah I'm going to bed.

Guarantee you in 15 minutes I'll be back up playing the sims.

Just yawned.. maybe not..